Wednesday, July 30, 2014

Tornado shopping at Macy's

Tornado shopping is an art. Tornado shopping is when your mom watches your infant while you frantically try to buy clothes that semi-fit you so you can return to work after maternity leave looking the best you possibly can. Yes, this is an art. And exercise. Well, I'm sweaty so I know it's exercise. 

Macys. Shoe department. So many things were odd today. First, I found about eight pairs of shoes that fit. That never happens so I had to play shoe survivor and eliminate the weakest links. Next, a gift card I had was not cooperating so the manager had to get a manager and that took a while.  So I screwed around the store. 

I saw a woman coming up behind me on my rear view vision (is that something you can have ?) and it seemed like she was going to knock into me, so I stepped to the side. She didn't change her course and knocked into a shoe display. Yes. Knocked into the display on the other side of me. Gave me a nasty look and said...

"Sorry, I didn't mean to crowd you."

Please note she was bitchy and sarcastic. 

What?   Didn't know Macys had a tequila section. She was drunk. At 4:30p. 

I weeded through the shoe wreckage back to check on my gift card progress and waited patiently. I noticed another woman maybe in her 70s pointing at me, motioning at me. In looked behind me. She kept at it. 

Me?

"Yeah, can you get me these in a size 6?"  "Uh, I'm sorry, I don't work here."  "Oh, well can you get me someone who does then!!"

What?

Manager of the manager was still on the phone and overheard the entire exchange. He was a very well groomed gentleman in his 20s.  He sort of smiled at me and I commented that you think I'd be dressed nicer if I were an associate ( running shorts and bandana clad).  He just rolled his eyes and said...

"You'd be surprised."

Not today, my friend. 

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