Having dinner with my girl cousins and sister last night, we covered MANY topics (as ladies usually do). One in particular struck me as very interesting. My cousin is a kindergarten teacher with a backgroud in social behavior and special ED. She said that she teaches her students (small children, mind you) to point out to others ONLY things that are under one's control at the moment.
For example: "Your sweater has a piece of lint on it."
This is ok. You could remove the lint. All is well.
NOT OK: "I don't like your hair."
Clearly, you cannot change your hairstlye for this person's taste. Hence, NOTHING you can do about it.
OR, "Your pants don't match your shirt."
Get it? Even at the primary level, if children can apply this concept, it amazes me that some adults cannot.
Thank you for this lesson Smokey! I will make sure I think before I say anything to someone and make sure it is something they can control as to not hurt their feelings.