Today I called Sprint to deal with a billing issue and the fact that I have not been able to log onto sprint.com for 3 months. Every time I get on the line with a rep they ask me my first and last name, phone number, mispronounce my last name and then ask how they can assist me. I let them know that I just want to be able to log onto the website so I can take care of my billing issue myself but my username and password are not working. It is not that I have forgotten them (and believe me, I don't forget this kind of stuff, I keep my usernames and passwords organized in a private place) it is that they are locked and they don't work. Here is what transpires:
Rep #1: Hardly speaks English and completely does not understand me. Disclaimer - Good for people trying to expand their horizons and for trying to learn a second or third language. However, if your job is customer service, probably not the best place for learning/practicing your new language. Transfer.
Rep #2: Tells me that I need to sign up for web access to get "what's called a username and a password." No kidding. I have both those. They don't work. He transfers me to "web support."
Rep # 3: Oh, you need to be transferred to Sprint. This is Nextel. Uh, didn't Sprint merge with Nextel? Just for fun, type in www.nextel.com. Guess where it takes you. Give up? SPRINT.COM! Transfer.
Rep #4: Dial Tone. Those bastards.
I call back. I weave through the automated system. Sit on hold for, um, let's see, 15 minutes while enduring really distorted music. Dial tone. Call back. Wait. Wait. Wait......
Rep #1 (#4): Tries to get me to sign up for a new account. Ok. I enter my cell number on the website and it tells me that number is not valid. Apparently I do not have a working phone. Funny, I have been texting people this whole time asking for cocktails. Finally Ms. Sprint puts me on hold and lo and behold, comes back and she has RESET THE SYSTEM! We create a username and password. The stipulations for the username and password are ridiculous, but that is ok, since we are finally getting somewhere. Now, she tells me that Sprint is going to send me a verification code that I will need to enter when I log in. Sounds good. I get a text. I go to log in. All of a sudden, I get SEVEN text messages with verification codes. The codes read like this: "RuyA7n3p" and "RxwsgFVP". How 'bout "uRsoFingAnnynG." None of them are working. So now I have to read them to her and she has to enter them herself. Thank God I know the military alphabet. This goes on and on. Finally I had to go to the bathroom so badly that I had to hang up with my rep. Problem not solved. One hour wasted. Seriously...65 minutes wasted.
Holla if you hear me on this one.